Article: Is It Flirting or Simply Noticing Beauty?
Is It Flirting or Noticing Beauty?
To be realistic, you have to understand that human beings will stare, glance, and look at each other out of simply just being appreciative of another persons beauty. They don’t just do it to people but, to art, newborn babies, music, watching a sunset or rise, or nature. Just because, a woman/man see another as beautiful in certain way, does not mean the person they are coupled with is not lovable or not loved as at all. It just means they are noticing that another person is beautiful.
If they laugh, or enjoy being in their presence that is not a bad thing. It is only conducive if what they act on infringes on the agreements they setup in their relationship. Your partner was looking at men and women before they met you, they will after. Not because they want them, but because their beautiful.
When you tell a person they can’t do something, you are not loving them, you’re trying to control them because, you fear you will lose the love in your relationship.
If you are insecure, you need to ask yourself, “Can I really lose the love in the relationship or is it my thoughts just projecting it fears onto the relationship?”
In reality, you can never lose the love you have for someone. You love them because, you love them. It does not matter if they love you. Your love for them is not conditional on the fact they love you. You love them because it is a joy, to love being in the presence of them.
Am I saying flirting does not exist?
No, I am saying that just cause flirting appears as that does not mean its flirting. But, consider you might just be overreacting. If your partner is flirting let your concerns and listen to theirs be heard but, don’t tell them what to do or that will exacerbate the issue and they will eventually leave you because you were not accepting them as they are.
Either they will continue to flirt or consciously change their behavior. But, if you are trying to control your relationship is a recipe for disaster.
Consider your partner is teaching you to love without conditions by bringing up your insecurities and fears. That is a lesson to learn.
To truly love, means being free to be who you are without judgment, manipulation, control or fear. That means all the lying games stop when it comes down to real love.
Noticing when you are in fear:
Just know when you’re in fear, you are not loving, when you’re being insecure or controlling, jealous or possessing, you are not loving. That is your opportunity to grow.
"We’re all here in this life to teach each other how to love without conditions. It’s getting rid of your preconceived ideas about love, so real love and come through the both of you."